the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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