what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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