On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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