you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize