so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
