I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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