I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
