I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Randomize
