he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
