pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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