Heybabeimwearingurpanties
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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