How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize