So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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