he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
