I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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