nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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