either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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