What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
