great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
