I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
