I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i wish my penis had a tongue
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
