Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
