It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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