I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize