I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
