he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
