I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
