He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
nutella sex= disaster
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize