Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize