Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
