dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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