you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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