I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
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