are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
