I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I'm way too hungover for life right now
My vagina is very pro this idea
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
