I am puke
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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