I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
