why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
