I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
