You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i think my mom watched the whole time
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
