Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Randomize
