Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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