what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
