Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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