if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
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