How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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