quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
