other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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