wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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