pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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